Why do we say we are Thankful?

You see it all over the place.  Newspapers, blogs, Facebook posts, text messages, email chains... everyone is thankful for their wonderful life.  They always say, "I am thankful to have such a wonderful family".  Why are you thankful?  Have you ever stopped to wonder what about them makes you thankful that they are around?  Well, I am here to tell you what I am thankful for as we get ready to celebrate another Thanksgiving Day and exactly why I am thankful.

My Husband.  I am so thankful for my husband because he really cares about me and our children.  He takes the time to help Lawrence with his homework and to "teach" him the ins and outs of all the latest technology for a 7 year old.  He gets up with Kherington at 3 or 4 every morning and feeds her before getting ready to go to work so that I can have that extra hour of sleep.  He sticks up for me, he worries about me, he cries real tears when we watch sappy movies.  He is my Husband and I love him and I am thankful that he loves me for who I am.  I'll be the first to admit I am not the easiest wife to have and I am demanding but he loves me anyway and you know what... I love him too!

My Kids.  My life would be completely different without my children but I am so thankful that Leon made me realize that we really did want some of them running around our house.  I am thankful to have had a little boy to buy all of the trucks and sports gear and gadgets for.  We had no boys in our family so he has been so much fun to watch grow.  I am thankful that he teaches me things about killer whales and dolphins when he comes home from school.  What a smart kid!  I am thankful for my daughter.  I was pretty much a tomboy until after high school  so I am thankful I get to enjoy the pink and dresses for a little while anyway.  I thank God every day that my kids love me, tell me they love me and give me kisses every night before bed.  Thanks to my kids for making me such a great mom.

My Sisters.  When we were younger and would beat each other up and tattle on each other I would always think, "I wish you weren't my sister!".  Today I am thankful to have 2 grown women who love me unconditionally and are there for me any time.  I am thankful that my sister Katie works at the same place as me and I can spend almost every single break and lunch with her.  I am thankful that Becky is right on top of things.  She always keeps me informed, whether I missed a birthday or she just read a book I always know what is going on in her life.  I am thankful that they love me even though I am not the best sister in the world and even though I am too busy most of the time to stop by and say hi.  My sisters are one of the best things in my life.

My Job.  I am thankful for my job.  Yes, I know, people complain about my company all of the time.  We complain about our bosses, our co-workers, our wages and working environment but shouldn't we really be thankful?  That job gives me a paycheck which pays my bills and gives me a nice home to live in.  It feeds my kids and lets them have a life that some do not have.  I am so thankful to have the knowledge and ability to work in the position that I do.  Thanks to the person who hired me 12 years ago and gave me a new chance to start my career.

There are many more things that I am thankful for but you would be reading all night long.  So, with that said, why do you say you are thankful?  Are you thankful for your husband?  Why?  Do you ever sit and think of all the special things that you have in life.  This Thanksgiving take time out from the turkey and really be thankful.  I know that I am and my life is wonderful because of it. 

Happy Thanksgiving everyone, enjoy your friends and family!

Friends ARE Family

Wow, my last blog got a lot of attention.  Hopefully it didn't seem like I wanted anyone to pity me.  I only wanted others to know how lucky we really are to have our kids.  When they are screaming, puking, arguing or even giving you big hugs and open mouth kisses remember how blessed you are to have them around. It took me a long time to realize that with my son after feeling like he was always an obligation and something that "married" people does is have kids so I HAD to do it.  When my little girl joined me I realized what it really means to be a mommy. 

Well, on to the subject of the week.  My wonderful friends.  Where would I be without all of you.  I most definitely have to dedicate this one to Crystal and Shae.  You guys have been there for me almost 20 years now!!  My life would definitely be different without you.  I was able to travel back to Wood River last weekend to visit with the two of them and a few other friends from school.  What an amazing thing that we go from riding bikes up to Casey's and sleepovers to sitting in the kitchen visiting about our kids and families.  Time sure does fly. 

Shae, I will never forget riding my old ten speed by your house the week before school started.  You were out in the front yard with Heidi and Dani and stopped me to find out who I was, where I was from and how old I was.  Thanks for being the one to take the first step.  I was so shy and self conscious I would have never stopped.  I am SO glad I did :)  Gosh will you ever forget when we were outside of Dowd's talking to you know who and my Dad pulled up?  Oh my GOD I thought we were dead meat.  HA  The old Omega.  We sang a lot of songs in that thing didn't we.  You boosted my singing confidence so much.  I loved singing with you because you made me sound so much better!  You really kept me grounded though and I needed that.  Somebody had to keep me in line!  You still do and that's why I love you babe.

Crystal, I don't even remember when we first started hanging out we spent so much time together.  Holy cow, remember when you test drove that white convertible!  LOL  Our hair was all over, you had yours tied down in the seatbelt.  We froze our ASSES off but we had to have that top down!  Oh my God I can't even listen to that Silk song or LL Cool J without thinking about you.  Holy cow we caused some trouble didn't we?  We never did open that "Professional School for Liars" oh well, probably a good thing.  HA!  All of those all nighters we pulled.  I think I slept through break every day at work.  We were the best at what we did though.  We never got caught! 

You two were major molders for my life today.  You guys both got me through a VERY bad boyfriend and even a couple more after that.  I made it through the hard times with my Mom and Dad with your support.  To this day I still tell people about my best friends and how you would come over to help me clean and do my chores just so we could go hang out.  I am so proud to still have you as friends and active parts of my life today.  I could have never picked 2 better Godmothers for my kids or 2 better bridesmaids.  Thank you for all that you do and all that you have ever done for me.  Sometimes we forget to say it but I love both of you guys from the bottom of my heart.  You ladies prove to me that Friends ARE Family and I would lose two sisters without you guys. 

Don't forget who your friends are, they are the ones that get you through it all.  Like the song says, if I had only one friend left..  I'd want it to be you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oPnhSFrkpno

My Miracles

So, it is time for the story to be told.  It carries a lot of emotion so I have not really shared it with too many people.  I have two little miracle angels in my life.  I have no one to thank but God and my FABULOUS doctor for giving them to me.  I was reminded how lucky we really were by my doctor the other day and I think my true friends would really want to hear the story. 

When Lawrence was born, he came to us through a natural delivery and only 9 days early.  The week before he was born I started spotting.  This was worrisome for us because a year earlier I had miscarried and it started out with the spotting.  After going in to the hospital to check it out, the doctor trusted the hospital ultrasound techs when they told him everything was fine.  Immediately when Lawrence was born I knew something was wrong.  He was very tiny and it scared me.  3 pounds 11 oz.  How can a baby be that small and be ok I would think to myself.  After 9 days in the NICU and some exams later we found that my placenta had started to age and my little boy was actually losing weight in the womb.  The doctor swears had it been 1 day later, we would have had a delivery but nothing good would have come of it.  My heart broke.  I swore I would never go through that again.  Little did we know...

In January of 2009 I had some pain in my hip.  I went to the doctor and we thought it was sciatic nerve issues so he gave me some vicodin.  A week later I was laid up and could not walk.  My leg had swollen so big I could not get pants on.  So, I decided we had to go back to the doctor and see what was up.  I have never seen a look like the doctor gave me.  He immediately said there was a clot in my leg and scheduled an emergency ultrasound.  They found a DVT that ran from my abdomen all the way to my foot.  I was immediately admitted to the hospital and had surgery to remove the massive clot.  At that time I was told that my contraceptive had most likely caused the clot and that I was lucky to be alive.  We went to the doctor in May to get clearance to have another baby.  They said yep everything is ok.  You are good to go!  Yay, we were so excited!  By September we found out we were expecting... that's when the fun began.

Shortly after I learned I was pregnant I was diagnosed with a blood disorder.  MTHFR.  This disorder is known to be the main cause of miscarriages and placenta tears and aging.  This explained Lawrence's issues.  Now what do we do?  I can't get rid of this baby because I am scared!  My doctor started taking preventive measures immediately.  I was required to give myself a blood thinner shot in my stomach every day and had regular ultrasounds every other week.  1 month before Kherington was to be born the doctors found a clot in her cord.  I was scheduled for induction 3 days later. 

When I went to the hospital to start my induction they found I had dilated so they decided to just put me on monitors and start the process in the morning.  We were sitting around the room visiting and watching TV and all of the sudden a rush of doctors and nurses ran into my room.  I was instructed to immediately lay on my left side and they put an oxygen mask over my face.  What was going on!?  I have never been so scared in my life.  My poor baby was in distress.  Her heartbeat was low and she was no longer kicking.  She was dying inside of me and I could do nothing about it!  They rushed me to the delivery room and decided to induce me right away.  That wasn't going to work, she was too high up to come out.  Then the discussions came for an emergency C-Section.  There was 1 problem.  My blood disorder.  As I am crying and holding the oxygen mask on my face the anesthesiologist came in the room and started giving us options for the procedure.  He said if I were to be completely put out it would cause a problem with the delivery and cause a lot of stress to the baby.  However, if I chose to be awake I was at risk of blood clots in my spine and permanent damage.  What do I do?  My amazing doctor sat by my bedside and started to calm me down.  He filled the anesthesiologist in on all of my blood problems and then he told me we needed to address if I was going to go through with getting my tubes tied.  I had never even though this was an issue.  Now he is telling me we can't guarantee that the baby will live and did I really want to tie my tubes in case something bad happened.  I had accepted the worst and we opted out of the tube tying.  What was about to happen?!

The doctor sat by my bedside for the next 20 minutes while they prepped the OR.  Emergency C-Section was the solution and I was not allowed to be awake because it had to happen that fast.  I was being given all kinds of medications to prep me for the surgery, my Mom was running around to find my Dad so he could take Lawrence.  Leon was running around to find his dad and get Lawrence from him to pass him off to my Dad.  I was left with my doctor.  He truly was my light through the whole thing.  I remember crying and looking at him telling him I was scared.  He patted my hand and promised he would make it ok.  By 8:15 they were wheeling me into the OR.  I was moved over to the operating table and given a bigger more secure oxygen mask.  Something was wrong, the monitors were not beeping.  They worked quickly and got me all prepped.  I had 3 anesthesiologist around my head.  One was holding my IV, one was holding my mask and another one had his fingers on my throat prepping me for the tubes.  By 8:28 they were ready, I looked at the clock they told me to count backwards from 10 and breathe deep.  I woke up at around 10. 

I was a mommy again!  I had a beautiful baby girl.  She was in the NICU which we expected because she was so early.  She weighed 4 lb 2 oz.  She was amazing.  Still not knowing anything horrible I was relieved.  Then the stories started coming in.  Kherington was born at 8:34, 8 minutes after I looked at the clock.  She came out with no heart rate and not breathing.  They had to resuscitate her.  She needed oxygen and heart monitors.  Her NICU visit would be totally different than Lawrence.  My baby had actually tried to leave me, but she came back.  God knew that I needed my little girl more than he did that day.  My doctor still to this day reminds me what a miracle she is and had we waited one day longer we would have had a tragedy. I am so lucky to have found such a great doctor and he will forever be someone I thank on a daily basis for both of my kids. 

Today I sit and think, how lucky am I to have both of my miracles.  My dear friend lost her little girl, and it is horrible that I didn't even realize what that was like until mine was almost gone.  Be thankful to God and to your doctor for your children.  I may complain a lot but my kids are my world.  I wouldn't give them up for anything and I don't know what I would have done had one of them not made it through. 

Thank you Lord for blessing me with such wonderful kids and a loving husband.  When I live that day over and over again in my head, I know my faith has brought me through this.  Once my miracles were born, I knew immediately I had to express my love for them by getting their names put permanently onto my body.  Ty Armstrong did an amazing job making sure that I always carry my kids on my shoulders. 

Love life and cherish it!

OH Grow Up!

So last night and today I learned yet another drawback of Facebook.  Good Lord.  I make a simple comment about how I have a horrible cough and it turns into a bar room brawl about people with cancer!  For Pete's sake, give it a rest will ya?  So the last thing I will say about that is you are an EFFING B!TCH and get over yourself. 
On to bigger and better things...
This weekend we will be getting our family pictures taken in Wood River.  My old stompin' ground.  I just can't wait to get back there to visit.  I always swear if I didn't have a good job and my family here I would move back in a minute.  I miss that place every day.  Lucky for me, I have some GREAT friends back there and I really look forward to seeing all of them when we go back to visit.  Unfortunately, we happen to be on the "outs" with a portion of Leon's family.  Too bad for them.  We've been together for 13 years now.  If they can't accept the fact that he has a wife and family of his own and that life is a two way street then EFF them too :)  HA  I guess I'm in an EFF WORD kinda mood tonight.  I'm glad my family has always been there for us not just with any $$ trouble but for any kind of advice.  I go to my Dad for almost everything.  God knows I am going to be a complete and total mess when he leaves us.  It helps to know that when he does leave he will be joining his big brother and raising a little hell up there road hunting like the good old days. 

So, here I am telling you all to grow up and I go on about how I depend on Daddy for everything.  Well, I guess I'll never get away from going to him and will most likely still go to him for help when he is gone.  Guess I better leave it at that for today and get ready for more baby time :)  I love my kids!

Harder than I thought it would be...

So this blogging thing takes a lot more time than I thought it would.  Sort of like my journal, it sits in my desk drawer and I write in it once a month if I'm lucky.  Here we are, November 6th already and we are switching the clocks again!  My days have been consumed lately.  Kherington is being extra needy and poor Lawrence is being Mr. Patient.  He really puts up with a lot for being the big brother.  I forget he is almost 8 years old already but to me he is still my little boy.  We finally had some quality family time tonight with a showing of Toy Story 3 in the living room.  It seems we are spending a lot more time in front of the TV lately because of the budget changes with a new baby.  We've had a busy week getting things ready for family pictures next weekend.  This means $$ but it will be well worth it in the end.  Christmas will prove to be a tough one this year, but Lawrence was warned last year that Santa would be splitting presents to two kids this year.  Hopefully his little "grown up" mind will understand on Christmas morning :)  I have a little business venture on the mind a lot lately and after visiting the craft show in Gering today I realized I would have made BANK if I would have thought of it earlier.  Hopefully I can get it going soon enough to be competitive and still bring in a little extra money. Here's to easier roads ahead and more WONDERFUL memories with my kids.  Without them I would be nothing.  Who would have thought that 9 years ago kids were the very LAST thing on my mind!