Beautiful, Crazy Miss K

Oh my Beautiful, Crazy Miss K.

What an eventful past few days it sure has been for our one of a kind Miss K.  Life sure does hand you a lot of lemons lil Miss, but you make some sweet lemonade out of them.  It seems your story is one that a lot of people do not know a lot about, so in case people want to know the background behind that smiling, never giving up face, mama is here to help tell it again.

Even though you came into the world fast and furious, you made sure that everyone knew you were here to stay.  You had those nurses in the NICU wrapped around your fingers and for those 9 days of your stay and you fought from your first breath to make sure everyone knew your presence was to be known from your first breath forward.  Crawling was hard for you and even though it took you two years to walk, you soon learned how to run.  You sat in the back seat of the car for all of the never ending trips to Shriner's over the years and let the doctors poke you and sat still for MRI's and through the needles and therapy sessions you were really a champ.  You really try the hardest to make all of your goals each time you are given one and that is why you are one of my biggest heroes.

You've grown over the years to run, swim and play with your friends and accomplish bigger and better things like playing softball with some wonderful girls and awesome coaches.  Crossing home plate doesn't happen very often for you, but when it does we make sure we cheer extra loud for you and so does your coach.  We are so proud of you when you do these amazing things.  As you have grown up Miss K, so many people have grown to love you and your spirit and all that you can do for you and so many people like you in the world and in your community.  You have so many friends big and small Miss K.  This is why we love you so very much.

Now, to the outside world, it sure looks like you are one spoiled kid doesn't it?  Does having a disability make you spoiled?  Does your legs hurting if you walk a long ways make you spoiled?  How about not being able to write all of your assignments with the rest of your class and needing to use special tools so the kids look at you funny.  Does that make you spoiled?  I know... it has to be the special, custom made bike that Mom and Daddy made for your birthday so that you could ride a bike just like all of your friends.  That surely must be what makes you spoiled.  Well let me tell you what lil Miss K.  If anyone ever tells you that you are spoiled, you just ask them if they like to be running and playing like a normal kid and then tell them that THEY are spoiled.  What you do every day  battling your Cerebral Palsy is harder than what most kids do every day and we are super proud of you for that.  You are my beautiful, crazy Miss K and nobody else does it better.

Tomorrow, you get to go back to the Dr after your horrible awful week in the hospital.  You were such an amazing patient in the hospital this last week.  You didn't cry when they poked you, you listened to mama and listened to Dr. P when he told you how to take your meds and what you needed to do to go back to school.  You really were the best of the best and you let those nurses know who was boss.  You made jokes about when it was time to take your meds and you even named your IV Pole "Buddy"!  Who else can be the best 9 year old in the hospital at your age?  My beautiful, crazy Miss K, that's who. Through life Miss K you are going to have ups and downs and I know that this next year, you are gonna tell life who's boss and make the most of everything you do.  Everything else can just say, adios... see ya next time because Miss K, you're takin' the highway to the good life.  Nothing can stop you now.

Was that a Puddle or an Ocean?

Well, what a trip across this big puddle it's been over the last 18 months, but I think we just might have stayed afloat and we didn't drown. 

Over the past 18 months our family has endured some pretty major life changes.  Kherington and I both have had significant health issues that really affected our daily way of life. Leon and I both faced the unexpected loss of our jobs and all income.  I jumped full force into a brand new career which had me never home, working constantly every evening on the computer and on the phone booking this and that and networking.  I didn't get paid for every minute of work, but I did meet some amazing people, experienced some beautiful moments and breathtaking music and learned more than I would ever learn in any classroom. 

Saving Abel - My First Rock Concert as a Promoter

Sold Out Crowd attending Saving Abel

IC Promo has given me the chance to connect and make friends with musicians, agents and clients across this entire country and for that, I am forever grateful.  I am still learning everyday.  The rewards are endless and out of everything, my newfound friendships are definitely the most valuable assets that I have gained.

Local Band "All We Seem"

LA Based DJ 'Perfetto' Performing at Shots Bar and Grill

All of this combined makes for a busy life.  During that time decisions were made quickly and in haste.  Some of these decisions were wonderful and some of them were awful.  Time was definitely our enemy. 

A Night with The Broncos Shriners Fundraiser

Extended family took a back seat.  Baseball, School and work became #1 in our life.  If we were at other functions or events I found myself still working or figuring budgets.  Bills were forgotten - often - everything and everyone else was forgotten - and ignored.  We did some great things as our Fab 4.  We even got to go all the way to Lincoln to watch my son play Football in Memorial Stadium.  Talk about every mother's dream come true.  That proud mama moment was wonderful.

Lawrence's Uniform in the
Locker Room at Memorial Stadium

Over the last 18 months our family had sadness and loss of family members and friends who were very close to all of us.  We were also blessed with new friendships who are now like family to us.  During these times, we have taken wrong turns with people who we have thought were friends and learned life lessons coming to realizations that these friendships were not right for our family and as in life, we usually get taught lessons the hard way because God wants us to remember them.  Some people swam through the rivers, lakes and oceans with us and some left us to drown.  For those who stayed, we thank you for understanding the true meaning of family and friendship.

Thank you for being the listening ears, the shoulders for us to cry on and for being there when we needed a step up.  Every single boost, smile, hug, phone call, text or message kept us going.  Know that we recognize who you all are, regardless if we haven't said 'Hello' for a while, or if we look like we sped by at the grocery store and ignored you.  Our minds these last few months have literally been on overload. 

We are making our way back- we will be better than ever.  Our lives didn't take that "downward crashing spiral" that you predicted.  Our kids "lives weren't destroyed, like we have destroyed ours"... yes people are that cruel.  If anything, these last 18 months have made us a stronger, healthier family.  Our Fab 4 is closer now than ever before. 

  

Thank you for showing us where the Raindrops in the Puddles of our life landed and for helping us to skip, jump, leap or swim through the puddles that were created. I was introduced to a song today and some lyrics hit me just right...

There's a road out in front of me
Nobody can see
I'm paving it as I go
Gonna take it wherever it leads

I remember.... but do you?

I remember that day, 17 years ago.  I remember watching in disbelief at 23 years old wondering how something like this would happen in my adult life.  All of these people are running, scared.  We were actually unable to protect ourselves.  We, as a United States were scared.  I remember being scared.  We went to work, scared.  People who owned our company were no longer alive, the paperwork was strewn about on the streets like trash.  What was going to happen to us?  What about all of those people?  How would they get out?  Who did this?  All of those people.  All of those poor people.  I cried.  

Planes crashed, towers collapsed, people died.  It was devastating.  2,996 people lost their lives and so many more were injured.  However, many people lived.  People lived.  Not just white people or rich people or black people.  People lived.  So many people lived through the help of so many others.  The all lived because they came together.  A white person stood next to a black person who was next to an asian person and all three of them were covered in soot.  The police officer escorted them all into an evacuation facility, but was one more important than another?  No, not at all.  United States flags were everywhere that the eye could see.  Communities came together to be one.  Our children we being taught about how wonderful it was to be a proud American.

During those moments of 9/11/2001 our country came together.  No one was protesting our flag or our country.  No one was protesting the first responders, or police on the scene.  We all stood together and helped one another.  We sang together, prayed together and we became American Brothers and Sisters.  Our country became strong.  We were one United Force, no one was a Democrat or Republican that day, we were Americans.  When the Firefighters lifted up the flag, we didn't kneel or argue; we cried and prayed for some shred of hope that there would be life left under the piles of rubble.  Our America came together as we all should daily to be a United States of greater good.  

Hope became the word that was spoken so much during that time.  So many people lost their loved ones and so many still believed in the humanity of togetherness.  Bill Clinton even visited the site and when asked if we should invade Afghanistan his response was, "we should wait until the President makes the decision after investigating the incident."  He respected our government.  There was no name calling or slinging from one party to another.  He proved that we can come together and have stood together.  If a protest started the people found a way to come together and get a long, they literally cried and hugged finding peace in their situation.  

Today, our world is different.  We argue about votes or government parties or shoes or the national anthem.  Since when was America such a horrible place to live?  At what point in the last 17 years did our country take such a bad turn that almost everything you read or listen to is so filled with hate.  We have to shield our children from most of the news and media because we don't want our children to see how America is now.  How awful our America has become in just 17 years.  It's almost as if the terror attacks brought us closer in a crazy way and enhanced all of the goodness in our country.  

I want to live in the United States that I lived in on 9/12/2001.  I fly my American Flag several times a year and very proudly so.  I don't want athletes to whine about oppression or disrespect our police and first responders.  I want our United States to be United again.  I want my children to be able to live in America like it was and be proud to be an American again.  Smile at your neighbor and don't avoid them because you know they voted for Hilary or Trump.  Make peace and know that we can be a United States as we were if we all stand together and all help one another.  Pray together, live together and be proud together.  Make sure that you always remember, because I will never forget. 

Buy the Onions that fill our puddles with tears of joy...

Last week, I had one of the most beautiful days of my life.  I decided to take a break from my work and school life and go out to enjoy one of Miss K's softball practices.  The weather was beautiful, the girls were having a great time with the two amazing coaches we have been blessed with and we were really enjoying just being parents and being blessed enough to be able to have the time to watch her at a practice on a weeknight.

As we were watching Miss K, I couldn't help but noticing a little boy playing in the background by the stands.  He had the greatest smile on his face.  You could tell he was so happy that it was nice outside, so that he could be out in the grass playing.  He seemed to have a bit of a disability or ailment, but it didn't stop him.  He played like nothing was going to stop him that day.  The boy looked as if he was maybe 5 years old, and I noticed his mother happened to be sitting right next to me.  She watched him, worried and telling him to be careful.  He kept laughing and smiling, completely oblivious to anything but the nice weather and all of the kids playing and having fun.

After a while of observing the little boy, I took a deep breath and reached out to the Mom next to me.  I asked her if she would mind if I asked her a question and that I didn't mean to pry.  I asked if her son had a disability, and to my surprise opened up to tell me the story about her little boy.  Her son is a miracle.  A true miracle that I have never seen in real life.  As she told her story I cried.  Her little boy was born at 1 lb 7 oz  at a very early age and his brother, only 1 lb 5 oz.  His brother did not survive.  This little boy survived, and... as you all know my beliefs, this little boy survived to tell his story.  He was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy and barely started walking on his own without a walker last week!  She said he taught himself to walk on his toes and he has never been so happy.  I wiped tears away again.  The boy had just turned 7 years old.  I was really struggling now to hold it together, but in my mind I told myself that this mother  was amazingly strong to tell her story and that I was going to listen.

After talking to the little boy's mother for a while, I strummed up a little more courage and asked who his specialist was here in town.  She put her head down.  This was difficult for her I could tell.  There has not been anyone here who could help this little boy specifically with his issues, they have been told only to go to Denver.  Surgery after surgery, visit after visit.  The boy has had braces, AFO's, a Walker, more scheduled surgeries and just endless medical care.  All of which, is not covered by Medicaid.  My mouth dropped.  She was living the medical care nightmare, but so much worse than what we had lived with Miss K.  I asked this mother if she had ever gotten help from Shriner's Hospital.  She said no, who is that?

It was very hard for me to not cry at this point in the conversation with this mother, knowing how many bills have built up for this family and how many surgeries the poor child has had to endure, especially with people like Shriner's Hospital for Children out there to help.  I explained what the Shrine would help with, how they help, what they would provide, and how much of a great help they have been to my family and SO many others.  The mother and I exchanged numbers and I promised to get her the information to start her help with Shriner's Hospitals.  There are other plans I have for this little boy, but that will come later.

So, what does that have to do with Onions??  Well...  each year all of the Shriners Groups across the United States do fundraisers to help their local Shrine Organizations send our kids and children like this little boy to the Shriner's Hospitals for Children to get the medical help they need.  One of the most famous fundraisers is the Vidalia Onion Sales.  These Onions have become quite famous across the states.  If you Google "Vidalia Onion Sales Shriners",  you will get pages and pages of fundraisers, news articles, Facebook Pages and so on.  They are a low priced way for all of us to pitch in and give back a little to our local Shrine.  You can look up any of the members selling these fantastic onions the Panhandle Shrine Facebook Page at   https://www.facebook.com/PanhandleShrineClubofWesternNebraska/, or you can find them at our local Main Street Market for sale.

Buy a bag of onions.  You could be the one who fills someone's day with tears of joy.

Filling up those puddles again…. At almost 40

It was movie day in our house and of course Mom had to pick the sappy movie of “Inside Out”.  As if crying most of the day wasn’t enough, the movie made most of it worse.  Now I’m snotting all over myself and my glasses are all fogged up. 

Here’s a tip, if you’re having an emotional day, try not to watch a movie that is based solely on emotions.  Every emotion we have combines together to make up our life.  All of the decisions we make and our memories that we keep shape the type of person we are and how we continue to live our lives as adults.  In an adult situation you could see memories of joy during the good times we have together with our friends or family members, and sadness when something hurts our feelings or someone passes away.  We feel fear when our children get hurt are in danger, we feel it when our friends are in a dangerous situation or our family members or friends are in the hospital.  We are scared of what the doctors will say.  As an adult we are disgusted of other’s behavior when they are the same age as us and the immaturity they show as a business owner or even a person in the general population shines through so horribly.  We get angry when someone we loves does something we don’t agree with.  If our kids break something or come home with bad grades.  We fight with our spouses and our friends. 

All of these feelings build us and mold us into genuine people, if you are a genuine person you should have all of these feelings most of the time.  If you are angry all of the time, as an adult you should take the time to sit back and think about some of the joy that has been in your life in the past and find it there.  Bring the joy and all of the other feelings back into your life.  Each of us need these things to survive. 

We can’t walk around being sad creatures all of the time or being super joyful all of the time.  I guarantee I get angry some days, but people compliment me on my smile more than anything.  I would like to think that my smile causes a lot of people to strike up a conversation with me, therefore I have a lot of friends or “acquaintances”.  I do, however, have very few close friends.  These have been some of the best friendships that I have cherished with all of my heart and feel that I could never replace with anyone else.  Many people know that my friendships mean more to me than almost anything besides my family.  In fact, I treat them pretty much like family.  I take them very seriously.  I have very few friends that I let into my family or into my home, but if you do earn that trust it means that Leon and I consider you a part of our family.  You can wear my clothes, take naps here, and roam around the house as you please.  These privileges aren’t given to anyone, especially when it comes to my kids.  With all of the special behaviors that my daughter has and the amount of time it takes for her to get to know someone, I am very picky about who I let into my home. 

When those emotions of disgust and anger come out with those types of friends, I don’t know what to do with myself.  I try to reevaluate the situation and see if something went wrong.  If the friendship was short, I try to see if maybe things came together too quickly.  Overall if a friendship like this is failing, the emotion of sadness takes over and sometimes it’s hard to get the joy back in your life.  The tears come from the pit of your stomach and stream down your face as you try to figure out where things went wrong.  Next, you have to try to figure out telling your kids that your friend that has been there forever all of the sudden won’t be.  No summer baseball games, no gymnastic stunts and no camping at the lake.  All of the promises to the kids were empty.  The emotions of sadness hit again and you have to think about what emotions your kids will be feeling and how you will bring the joy back into their lives.  The smiles that were in their lives yesterday that are no longer there today. 

As a child memories were always important to me, and my memories of growing up have stayed with me as I’ve become an adult.  All of my memories weren’t good memories, but the good memories were some of the best times of my life.  I remember times way back to when I was four or five years old back on the farm and having great times busting windows out of the barn with my cousin.  Fun memories…  not so fun later when I got in trouble, but it was still fun.

As a parent my main goal in life is to make memories with my kids.  It might be a night in our backyard pool cooking some hamburgers on the grill, or it might be driving down the road and Leon teaching Lawrence to fix a flat tire in the summer when it’s 100 degrees.  The best thing is, they will be memories.  The hardest part will be deciding, in the future, who will be involved in making the memories with them.

. 

The raindrops from our hearts are building oceans between our souls....

Today I have a great deal weighing on me.  My heart is so heavy.  Our community has been so full of sadness for so long, we yearn for something good to happen.  The hate in our country is just overflowing and I don't know how we will ever get it out of our system.  Racism, hate, bullying, harassment, there just isn't an end to what is wrong in our world today.  However, today... today in our small community I saw more hate and evil than I could ever see and it brought  physical pain to me. 

Let me tell you a story about how the past few months have played out in our home.  My daughter, as most of you know was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy when she was age 3.  It took until she was age 3 because of some delays in paperwork and doctors who didn't agree with what they saw.  My daughter did not crawl until she was 1 year old and she did not walk until she was 2.  From the age of 3 to 5 she was in daycare and preschool.  She had developmental delays as expected from children with Cerebral Palsy which delayed her speech, fine motor skills, walking, running and a lot of things in her life.  She was given inserts into her shoes to help the wide gap in her hips and also to lower the amount of toe walking she did when she was younger.  As she grew older she became very frustrated with the lack of communication she was able to have with other kids, teachers, caretakers, her brother, her cousins, grandparents and even us as her parents.  She would throw "fits" throwing her head back, crying and as she got older the fits would resemble rage as they grew longer and longer.  She cried and cried and cried.  We were heartbroken because we could not understand why she threw her "tantrums" as they were called by her caretakers.  As we learned throughout her preschool years, these were normal for children of Cerebral Palsy who often became frustrated that they were unable to work as fast as other children, or were feeling inadequate in the classroom.  The children often feel the need to have immediate attention from an adult or whomever is in charge.  Their pencil needs sharpened, or the obsess over having the blue marker that day.  There is no definite trigger, but there are compromises that can be made and ways to help comfort or console the child through their frustration.

As my daughter grew and got into the elementary school level we were scared for her.  She was adjusted to the Kindergarten level by her best friend being in class with her.  Her first year in school was not so bad, we were happy.  We thought maybe the worst of her years was behind her.  When first grade hit, we were sorely mistaken.  Throughout that year, my daughter was kicked out of daycare because of her fits of rage.  As a 5 year old, in these "blackout" sessions she was able to lay on the floor and physically lift a teachers desk with her legs almost bringing the desk completely down on herself causing physical harm.  The daycare was not educated to care for my daughter and she was asked to leave for fear of harm to staff and other children.  I was devastated.  My daughter was not a demon child.  She didn't do these things at home.  It had to be the staff.  I found that the staff was restraining her and causing her fits to become worse and worse.  She was so worn out that she would fall asleep by 4 in the afternoon from being so tired of screaming and crying throughout the day.  My daughter had no way to communicate what her issues were.  We moved on and hoped for the best.

In 1st  Grade, the fits became awful again.  She would start harming herself.  She pulled her hair out, she punched herself, she threw things at her teacher.  Why was this happening to her?  What was setting her off?  She again, did not do this at home so what could be happening?  We took her to the Doctor again.  No issues with her brain, there were no neurological disorders.  The Shriners could not help her, they stated that sometimes children have seizure like episodes and that they don't even remember when these things happen.  Will this happen forever?  What are we going to do?  We were scared.  Then summer came.

My daughter went to summer camp.  She loved it.  There were probably a total of 10 incidents the entire summer and she even earned camper of the week.  The positive environment really changed her!  We were so excited for school to start.  She really grew up over the summer we thought to ourselves.  We were wrong.  The issues had nothing to do with growing up.  The issues were all about the environment.  My daughter started 2nd Grade.  Due to my daughter being a "special needs" child as so BLATANTLY expressed by our local media today, she was on an IEP or an Individual Education Program.  This was developed in coordination with us, her principal, her counselor and her therapists at the school.  We found out during the first 9 weeks of school that her teachers and administrators were not following her IEP.  This set my daughter back quite a bit.  Throughout the rest of the school year, we have had to go to the Disability Advocacy and get representation for her, we've had to set up numerous amounts of meetings with the administrators, I've had to take my daughter for Psychological Evaluations, Counseling Sessions, Doctor Appointments and now am dealing with night tremors because of her fears of school.  She refers to herself as the worst kid in school.  Children laugh at her and make fun of her because she is "naughty" at school.  The teachers and administrators try, I think, to the best of their ability.  However I think there is so much more that could be done. 

Today it was revealed in our community that another "special needs" child had hurt someone, possibly more than once at their school.  The hate and anger that was lashed out toward that child was just awful.  It was plain despicable.  I am hurting tonight.  I am sad.  No children or teachers should be fearful when they are at school.  I have another blog that will be published tomorrow regarding a different situation on the other side of this spectrum....  However, I can't, I can't stand behind someone who would deliberately spew hate and hateful words toward a special needs child.  Yes, my own mother is a teacher.  What would happen if my mother was injured.  I would be mortified.  I would demand answers, but I would never blame the child.  Ever.  This child is a victim as much as the teacher. 

Please I am asking all of you.  Please.  Please think with your heart.  Please.  Please remember what time of year it is.  Jesus died for our sins.  He is asking us all to forgive, please. 

My God please.  My daughter.  My own daughter is going to be 18 one day.  What happens when she turns 18?  What will you say to her?  Are you going to go after her and bury her at the stake?  Will you burn her on the cross?  Please.  Please think of the child in all of this.  Please remember there are things that they can't control.  Some people were talking as if "these kids" shouldn't be in our schools.  What are "they" doing among us?  Please listen to yourselves.  Please my child is a human too.  Does she not deserve to walk the earth with us?  Does she deserve to be locked up?  She is not a monster all of the time.  You all see her out and about...  she is not a devil.  My own daughter does these same things at age 7.  Now, compare her to that child and think twice please.  Please let's all work together to help our children, our teachers, our schools and our communities to prevail. 

Let's not build walls, rivers or oceans of raindrops between our souls. 

Mirror check...make that change.

Over the past few weeks, my kids have been watching Glee on Netflix and it has been wonderful to see the shine in their eyes when the kids sing on the show.  Although it's not reality, it's something wonderful to see that they dream of doing something like that in their life.  They have a dream that has to do with the arts and music and that makes my soul feel wonderful inside.

Today when I crawled out of bed and brewed my cup of coffee my daughter was watching Glee, of course, and the kids were competing in some contest and ended their competition with "Man in the Mirror".  I went into instant goosebumps and knew that I had finally hit the nail on the head with what I wanted to write my blog about this month.  I've been trying to write for two weeks, I click on my new post and I can't ever finish. 

It's the holidays. We all have our routines that we follow during the holidays with our families and friends.  The baking, the dinners, the parties and decorating.  The constant asking for this and that from the kids and making of lists for Santa, shopping and wrapping and checking each list to be sure that you didn't forget anyone.  Does this all sound familiar to you?  Let me shed some light on why I'm looking in the mirror this Christmas.


I spent my Thanksgiving Day crying this year.  Crying because I knew that I wouldn't be able to go Black Friday shopping to pick up the sale prices I needed to pick up for those perfect gifts on my kids' Christmas lists.  Then I was crying because I fought with my father about being on my cell phone, trying to work and make money by booking an event or sell a sponsorship or an ad or a website so that I could make some money to spend even 50 dollars on Black Friday on just one single gift.  Then I cried because I got a text message that my phone was scheduled to be shut off in the morning.  Everything was coming to fruition.  My medical bills were crazy, I had been kicked off of unemployment for a week because of surgery, and my new self employment idea was going off to a not so good start.  I cried, all through dinner.  The best part about social media is that I get to live a life that's not my real life.  Pictures speak a completely different language than reality. 

So, today when I heard that song it kind of spoke to me.  I mixed that along with a video that I saw on social media the other day and I felt like it really captured what Christmas was about for us every year, but I was focusing on the wrong thing so much this year.  My family has always been an enormously giving family.  I've provided food, gas, Christmas trees, decorations and gifts for others in need.  This year some other families helped us during a couple of tough times and we were so grateful.  My kiddos have learned that  it's not about the expensive gifts.  Do they ask for them still?  Sure, but it's just in hopes that maybe Santa might pull through.  Their lists are relatively small and the gifts are all simple.  Things like guitar strings, color books, markers.  Simplistic things. 

This is where I feel I have succeeded in life.  With my children.  When my son saw me struggling on Thanksgiving, he brought me a 50 dollar bill and with tears in his eyes asked me to buy a Christmas tree for his sister.  He had been saving his mowing money the last few months to go Black Friday shopping himself because he knows there are always great deals on video games on those days.  I gave the money back and told him that I would find a great tree and for him to use the money he earned.  My daughter keeps trying to do things around the house to earn money to buy her hedgehog Theo his own gifts from her.  These are the gifts that I ask for at Christmas.  I want to see the giving spirit and kindness reflected from myself into my kids.  Kind of like looking at myself in the mirror, if you will.

I believe that the help we received during our hard times and the help that we have given to others really has helped teach my children how it feels to give.  We make sure to involve our kids when we deliver Meals on Wheels and they love to help deliver the meals.  You see, to us the holidays are supposed to be about smiles, and laughter.  They should be about friends and family.  Spend the holidays with those you love.  Have a sleepover on the living room floor with your best friends who don't have anyone to spend the holidays with.  In my family, your friends are family and they always will be.  My home is always your home and you are always welcome.  Lord knows that we make enough food to feed a hundred people at the holidays. 

This year, make sure that you are being the person that you want to see a reflection of yourself in your children.  Do that mirror check... make that change.  Is the man in the mirror who you want to see or do you need to fix something to make a difference?  Start with you, change your ways and open your mind.  Merry Christmas everyone!  I love you all for the enormous support you have always shown me in my writings and my family in our adventures.

~Carianne